//grace, not perfection
So, I took a little break from blogging in March.
I was feeling incredibly overwhelmed. I wanted to be this perfect semi-single mom, and have the perfect clean house, hit all the excellent numbers at my 9-5 job, do well with my freelance clients, spend time with my son, AND make sure that I hit all the correct things you're supposed to hit when you're active on social media and blogging.
The reality is, it's just not possible.
And I knew that, I really did, but I was still struggling with that. Why can't I have it all?
Someone suggested maybe I take a break from being so active on social media, and I am glad I did! It allowed me to slow down and re-prioritize what is going on in my life. It allowed me to create and establish routines that way when I was ready to blog again, like I am now, I am not feeling like I HAVE to blog, and instead, I am writing because it is something that I truly enjoy!
I want to share two things that helped me into this mindset. First, is Emily Ley's Grace, Not Perfection mindset. We live in a society where everything is on blast, all the time. It is so easy to compare yourself to the next mama, model, rockstar. But this lifestyle has to be about giving yourself (and your kids) some grace.
Another quote that has totally knocked me off my boots is a quote by Rachel Hollis in her book, "Girl, Wash Your Face". Ladies, if you are a mom, YOU NEEED TO GET THIS BOOK. It was SO good, that I have decided I am re-reading it for a second time because I want to be sure that i am able to absorb ALL the good truths in there. In her chapter, "Other people's kids are so much cleaner", one of her last points, things that helped her, was her priorities. She says, "You can keep a clean house or start a company or start home with a baby or build a slammin' bod from working out seven days a week...but I don't think you can have all of those at the same time, or at least not in the same increments. "
TRUTH ladies! Why are we trying to be that perfect Instagram mom? At this time in my life, you know what my priorities are? My son and my business. Because I am still working, sometimes that means working a 10 hour day, and coming home and freelancing, which gives LITTLE time for me to work out, but guess what? I've stopped beating myself up over it, because this is a season of life. And seasons change, y'all.
So, what has helped me embrace this new mindset you ask?
1) outsourcing
The reality is, I cannot do it all. I am NOT a super woman. I am a human being, who has a very limited network in San Diego. The two things I outsourced were my meals and housecleaning!
For food, I ordered Veestro (vegan, frozen meals) and I have been eating that most of the time. That gets expensive so now that things have kind of settled into a routine, I am going to try vegetarian E-Meals and grocery pick up and see how that works. As far as the house goes, I can't even begin to tell you what a huge sigh of relief I feel when I come home and see my floors have been mopped and my microwave is sparkling white. It's SUCH a weight off of my shoulders, ya'll. I know everyone may not be able to afford to outsource somethings, but my gal, Jenna Kutcher, says "Think of the money you could be making while someone else is doing that dreaded task for you" (I paraphrased...). And it's so true! I can be working on freelance clients, instead of mopping, which I HATE anyways!
2) time-blocking
I am a huge calendar person. My friend Kailee and my cousin Mimi LOVE their bullet journals, and for a minute I tried to utilize that, but try as I may, I need a pre-dated, daily/hourly calendar! I always go back to my Emily Ley Simplified Planner (sorry, girls! Your bujo's are beautiful though haha!). I love that the planner breaks everything down hour by hour so I can block my hours off for time blocking. What that means, is that I set a designated time or day to work on a project or task and I focus on that task, and that task ONLY!
This helps me because I am the person who gets sidetracked by.... email.... facebook.... instagram.... oh, I'm cleaning, but I stumbled across a pair of Dresden's 6 months pants, so let me pull all of his old clothes for storage.... oh, but when I am doing that, I just realized, I need to organize his books....that reminds me, I need to clean out my books.
NOPE! No more. One task, one time block! An app that helps me, especially when I am straightening up the house, is called Be Focused. I will set the time for 20 minutes and do as MUCH as I can and when the timer goes off, I get a five minute break.
Try it. You will be AMAZED at how much can accomplish in 20 minutes!
3) batching
No, I don't mean making a batch of cookies. Batching, as in planning/creating ahead of time. I now have a day that I use to blog (which, NOT coincidentally, aligns with the day I blog for my freelance client...ala the beauty of batching...doing ALL types of things at the same time), and I have a day to plan (Sundays, because...duh), and that's pretty much all I currently batch at the time. My goal is to begin to batch Instagram content like my aforementioned #goals boss babe, Jenna Kutcher, but I can't even pretend that my life is that put together at this point!
And that's it, y'all! My life is still messy...I can't wear a piece of clothing without my 1.5 year old getting food on me...and I am struggling to fight the perfection mindset but incorporating these three things into my life has definitely made it easier.
We have to stick together, ladies! Tell me - what do you incorporate into your routines that have made your life so much easiser?
“Sit down and decide what’s really important to you. Not what’s important to your mother-in-law or your girlfriends...Decide what’s really important to YOU. Then do those things first. If the house is cluttered or you need to wait until next year to train for a half marathon, well, thats just life. ”